Plan for 6 weeks

The midwives all said to plan for 6 weeks, so I did. My sister-in-law told me that she had been taken unawares by how long it took her to recover from her c-section and to find a rhythm with her newborn. I was mentally prepared for the worst, and so when I felt pretty good after 4 weeks, it was a nice surprise. That being said, even though physically I was feeling ok, the breastfeeding didn't hit its stride for me until about week 8. Basically, if it isn't one thing, its another. Some babies sleep poorly, or get thrush. Some women get infections in their stitches, or mastitis from engorgement. I'm thinking that the best thing to do is to plan for the maximum recovery time and take it easy until then. And even if I was prepared, I was my own worst enemy, constantly thinking that I 'should' be more active or 'should' be feeling better, or I 'should' do more. In many cultures, women are expected to do NOTHING for 6 weeks except take care of their baby and themselves. It isn't easy to lâcher prise of the Western ideal of always being on the run or accomplishing a million things. In those early weeks, you are in fact accomplishing the most important thing - welcoming a new person and introducing them gently to the world.

The first few months: lessons learned

Adrian and I had a baby this past June. She is delightful and a daily joy in our lives. In the large scheme of things, having her has been completely rewarding and fulfilling bla bla bla, but, let's not kid ourselves, the first weeks were hard. Frustrating. Exhausting. Emotionally draining. I thought that my life would never be the same, and not in a good way. But, every day, Adrian and I discovered ways to make our lives a bit easier or learned the hard way what not to do. I also remember some minor epiphanies. I thought that I would share some of what I learned for my friends who are pregnant or have children. Hopefully, you'll pass on what you've learned as well.

Here is a starter list, and I'll elaborate on each point in separate posts.

• Plan for 6 weeks
• Eat breakfast
• Get help with breastfeeding quickly
  
• Request food
  
• Watch and listen to your baby
• Dads are great!
• Schedules, no. Routines, yes!
• Beware the orthodoxy of others
• No fear